A Time

for everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven.

a time for quiet strength to be born, and a time for insecurity and  self doubt to die.

a time to plant courage, and a time to harvest peace.

a time to kill self-hatred, and a time to heal from fear of abandonment.

a time to tear down walls that protect me, and a time to build up hearts that love me.

a time to cry about how hard its been, and a time to laugh about how hard its been.

a time to grieve over the loss-of-my-back-as-i-once-knew-it, and a time to dance because i still can.

a time to scatter people who don't give a rip about me, and a time to gather people who do.

a time to embrace my voice, and a time to turn away from worrying about what other people think.

a time to search for balance, and a time to quit searching for the finish line.

a time to keep whats important, and a time to throw away all the rest.

a time to tear apart right doctrine, and a time to mend what i deeply believe.

a time to be quiet about what isn't, and a time to speak about what is.

a time to love slow steady transformation in myself others, and a time to hate impatience.
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a time for war against resistance, and a time for peace in the chaos.

amen.

Finding Your Inner Strength

One day as I lay in bed, I watched as the wind blew with such velocity. The trees were being tossed around like they were rag dolls and it reminded me of our own inner strength. As a tree is blown around, it doesn't think about what might happen to it. It doesn't wonder or worry if it will survive. In the midst of chaos, it stands with its roots planted firmly in the ground, trusting and knowing that "this too shall pass."

As a survivor of domestic violence, it reminded me of the time I had made a conscious decision to leave and never look back. I, too, had felt the powers of the wind. My tree was blowing and I felt it would snap in two in a moment.

Deep within each one of us, there is a core. This core is our balance, it's our center, one could even say it's our own "trunk," our pillar of strength. However, somewhere along the line we often  lost sight of our own inner strength and we find ourselves feeling weak, dis-empowered and possibly hopeless.

One of the ways in which an abuser controls us is by making us believe that we are powerless, that we have lost our inner strength and that we cannot live without them. Usually it starts with verbal abuse or mental abuse as we become continually bombarded with statements that we are lazy, worthless, selfish, among others. Over time, we begin to believe it and then we own it. From there, day by day, our inner strength fades, we become hopeless, our branches may break and we lose ourselves in the storm.

Your inner strength lives deep within you. It is always there, even if you feel you've lost it somewhere. Finding your inner strength is finding yourself. You reach deep down within you and plant your roots solidly, deep within the earth. Feel yourself connecting, feel yourself gaining your footing. This is where it begins, as you gain more confidence you awaken your inner strength. The more awakened you become the stronger your roots become.


Tami MacDowell
"Be your own awakener to the beauty and power that are alive in you right now."
John-Roger